Monday, October 25, 2004

So my day had a small highlight.... I got a new tank and got one cleaned... and it seems that all the fish are doing just fine....

... but.... first of all... I havent heard from Tanya in so extremely long.... I emailed her once... called her once.... havent heard from her.... tonight my mom told me that she was back with Eli's dad.... I just wanted to cry.... ok.. maybe I did a little.... Im really starting to hate myself for breaking up with her.... maybe we werent perfect together but at least... well, at least she was happy and in good shape.... not that I was it... but she was.... and well... I dunno... I guess I shouldnt be worried but I am.... and if Eli's dad is why she hasnt talked to me... that just hurts really bad.

.... THEN.... I havent even so much as seen Tiff online... no posts to her blog... I just want to know she's ok... but I dont.... all this adds to what has already been going on.....

I guess I've made some seriously stupid decissions and ive not been there to help others.... I really am not feeling too proud of myself.... Maybe I deserve this?

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