Im so misserable tonight.... no even explaining it... Dr. Gaul called me back... he gave me permission to take Xanax or Ativan if need be.... I cant believe I'm back to this point again.... I need a therapist or a psychiatrist or something.... I put a call into Western Psych's IOP to see if they can get me to a psychiatrist soon.... I really need some serious SERIOUS prayer... im in bad shape.... sure I look happy... but im not... im not in the slightest.
.... and now I get ready to drive to VA.... just another parts of my mundane week... I really hate my life.... I hate being alone.... I hate it all....