God Bless everyone as we bring in 2008.
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God Bless everyone as we bring in 2008.
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile
I keep feeling like God created me many years before I was born and just forgot to actually send me to earth. He finally remembered in 1980 but I was already at least 2 generations too late.
My life is just the same thing over and over again. It happens where I work, where I go to church, who I'm friends with, and even who I date. When someone needs help I put my all in to it. I always have the impression that whoever I'm helping will, in turn, appreciate what I am doing and will do the same if needed. While this was the way life was (and still should be) years ago, it isn't the case now. The result is I'm continually punished because I focus on caring about people but when I'm hurting not only is there no one there to help me, the people that I have been helping expect me to just keep going because they've grown accustom to whatever it is I'm doing.
So at a job, ill get the "this is business and that is personal" comment. The problem is that in order to be so passionate at work, I rely on all the good in my life but when there is a time of trial I end up going back down to average; average in the same standards that an employer will look for in a replacement. But because I put my all into something for a average pay doesn't mean I get a raise but it just means that the standards I get headed on go up. And these standards won't carry over to the next person they hire. No, they just apply to me without me getting any additional benefits. Naturally things go sour in the eyes of the employer and they generally end up disapointed in me. I end up back at square one. With people in my personal life, they just tag me as a horrible person and ignore anything that I did that was good for them. These are the things that turn me into a failure in everyone else's lives and, eventually, my own.
This is my life but its also an example of how society is in a downward spiral. The problem is that no one wants to stand against it because, well, you end up here writing this blog. For me, I don't know how else to live but I don't know if I'd want to anyway. Its just going to continue to be my life and all I can do is pray that I will someday find a girl who has this same problem. Of course I'm not holding my breath because they've all been with numerous guys in the past and have no desire to take a chance on me. Their solution to the problem is to change nothing but if they happen to find a guy that cares they just take what they can until it requires something of them. Once that time comes then the relationship with that vendor.... Oh, I mean person.... is over. We all hate corporate America but we live our lives with the thriving corporation as our bible. So what with that ancient book that was named "Bible" - we have new and greater things in our lives now.
Now some links for your reference:
Posts at Satisfaction:
People to Follow:
Twitter apps to help you cope:
Send TXT via phone:
Stuff to think about:
This county's health system sucks. The commercialization of health care is pathetic. Corporate America is about stepping on others to make money. When you apply this mentality to an industry about taking care of sick and dying people you can't expect it to work.
I am outraged about the developement going on around my house. The building of stuff in Front Royal is sickening but they've gone a step further: they've already cleared 2 lots on each side of my house and today the building began in the lot closest to me. I haven't even lived in Linden for half a year and the place has changed so drastically already. This whole situation infuriates me beyond belief. I moved away from NoVA because I couldn't deal with this type of stuff and now they are invading me. The worst part about this is the fact that there are already a lot of houses on the market but of course the NoVA mentality makes you pathetic if you wear used clothes, buy a used car, or even live in a new house.
What is the deal with this mentality from girls that no guy is capable of love. I am reading email after email, Blog after Blog, and having conversation after conversation that collectively puts guys down as a whole. I know many guys are assholes but if you believe that you can never trust a guy then you destroy the guys left that do actually care and rather than make the world a better place, you make it a hell of a lot worse - including your own world. There still are some guys that care who's hearts are continually broken because they are stereotyped as being "just another guy" and girls lose those guys because they can't trust and they can't make sacrifices for them. Even worse, those girls end up ultimately destroying those guys so that no one else can have him. This game between genders needs to stop or our world of hurt us going to start hurting more and more!
Please pray for me. I really need it.
Since I have moved to Warren County I have really been liking it. I do really like my house and I really like the fact that it is back in the woods. I really like sitting at my computer and watching the squirrels run around outside my window.... Or the deer that share these woods with me as their home. The problem? Me forgetting to actually take the time to enjoy these things.
Right now I'm sitting on my back deck... The moon is shining through the trees, the breeze is blowing leaves on the trees... There is a dog barking in the distance.... Deer passing through my yard.... And the traffic on the interstate is off in the distance as a reminder that there is a time to be in that mess and a time to enjoy the blessing that God has given me by retreating from all of that mess at night.
Its amazing how nature takes care of it's self and yet we are constantly stressed and frustrated. The difference is that nature just let's things happen and we second guess everything that comes our way. We are such a proud species that we can control our fate, yet all we do is screw it up. We ignore our gut feelings in order to follow our human logic which is obviously flawed ... Only to some day realize that our gut feeling was right. And our logic tells us to learn from our mistakes but yet the next time our intuision tells us something, we promptly ignore it in order to find that it was, yet again, correct.
I really can not understand why we act the ways that we do and how we ignore evidence that we are bringing more problems on ourselves. I guess that's our pride again. We just don't want to admit that maybe we were wrong.
We have been given so much but we forbid ourselves to accept that because there is more out there. We forbid ourselves to enjoy what we have because it simply isn't "good enoug" despite the fact that it may be the answer to some dreams but the problem is there are now better dreams.
We forget to enjoy the blessings that are in our lives and we lose them because we just simply could not admit that that single blessing was "good enough"
I simply can not fathom this. My best friend is a single mother and she is one of the greatest people I know. Sure, she has shortcomings but don't we all? And maybe being in a relationship with a single mother would have additional responsibilities but these are expected and there are additional rewards to actually caring about a child - have you ever had one smile at you? I just can not fathom how someone could write off their own son because he cares about not only someone who has a child but a child as well.
What really gets me about this is something that always has bugged me. Sex before marriage is a "tolerable sin" but having a child is just a plain unacceptable sin? People place degrees on things instead of just seeing right or wrong. Gray areas exist inside peoples beliefs by what they hold true as right or wrong should be just that. Its like someone saying that breaking in to someone else's house is wrong as long as you don't take or harm anything. If you are someone that believes breaking in to someone's house is ok, well, I'm sure your not going to argue that stealing is wrong. You just can't skew consequences because of the result of something you believe wrong occurred. Furthermore, how dare you attack someone who actually has forgiven someone of their past. From experience I can say that its not always easy to recognize someone for who they are now rather than what they've done but I can also tell you that in doing that I have found treasures inside of someone's heart and mind that no one would have been able to find without actually caring about someone and her little girl.
I guess the bottom line is I care about my friend very much and if anyone accuses me for being wrong for that then it really is their problem and not mine.... While I know my mom (who actually wants to meet these 2) would never attack me for something like that, there is no way that I would respond any different to here than I would anyone else.
If your curious what I'm up to, check my twitter page
This is Kendra's daughter, Kayleigh! We had a great day at the aquarium in Baltimore.
Something just hit me... The prefix for- means to come before. Isn't it ironic that give is the second part of forgive. Hmmmm... I guess that means that someone can't earn your forgiveness.
So what are the two directions? Ironically the basis is dependant on servitude. Most issues with the world are related to people's atitudes. The majority of these issues are because of selfishness (that is, the lack of helping others). We all have the choice of whether we are going to help someone despite the fact that they don't deserve it or we help them because we believe its the only way the world can become a better place.
This world is in moral decay because no one will help others. Its not this way because all of a sudden we don't deserve the help because we have never deserved it. The reason why we are in decay is because we all know and take to heart the fact that no one deserves our help. We become bitter and erase the fact that anyone has ever showed us grace. After developing this thought process, we come to the conclusion that everyone else owes us. Suddenly, we aren't helping anyone, not only because they don't deserve our help, but because they owe us.
The human race has written off the world. In our minds it is full of evil people and that's where we stop. We don't see that each one of those people are someone just like us who only needed someone to take a chance on them but never got it.... Meanwhile we sit here and argue why that person is less than us. We constantly explain how we would take a chance on someone who was in the same scenereo as us, we are presented with people that fit that description but in a different way, and then we punish that person for everyone else's mistakes - no matter how much potential we see in that person.
There are consequences for all actions but there is also forgiveness. If we can't forgive, then we end up hating everyone. We will never take a chance on someone else because we haven't forgave those that previously hurt us. This is what we are progressing towards. I'm sure we can all think of at least one teacher in school that really made an impact on us - and you can bet that teacher was someone that cared more about the students than the paycheck. The more we progress, the more the paycheck means to us. We fight for more money in a job that we are horrible at for no other reason than not being passionate about it. We work for the sole purpose of bettering ourselves and when this filters into education, healthcare, and other social fields, well, look around you.....
We need to stop asking who is going to take a chance on us. We've had people take at least one chance on us even if it was one teacher back in grade school and we didn't pay it forward. If we start looking for people to take a chance on then there actually might be a reason society should take a chance on us. So many people have served us with such selflessness and we can't even find it in our hearts to recognize it because we are so bitter about who didn't help us.