Sunday, November 11, 2007

There was once a time that this Blog was a real source of encouragement because I had people that read it because they cared about me and they thought enough to leave a comment or send me an email. I know those times are over. I guess it doesn't stop me from blogging to the wall tho.

I just have really been struggling with some things and the biggest thing that's been hard on me is the realization that I'm really not good enough to help anyone. I really don't have anything to offer anyone. I am just a poor country not trying to keep myself alive. I don't have any money or any real posessions. Hell, I'm even extremely far from being an attractive person. I try so hard but I just never seem to make much of an impact on anyone. Anyone I try to help just seems to stick around long enough to see if I have something to offer and then run when they realize I don't. Do you have any idea how bad it hurts to not even be good enough to volunteer? Seriously... It hurts.

I know this is all my fault somehow and I know that many many people have it worse than me. That's all ice ever been told when ice been hurting. Seriously, if I really was worth something then someone trying to cheer me up would say that instead of having to use those lines.
I don't know. I'm just tired of feeling all alone in my battles. I try my best to help others with their battles but I guess if I fail at those, there really isn't a reason for them to help me with mine.

Yea, I know... This is life. Ill just keep being worthless and try to continue hiding it so I don't interupt anyones perfect life.

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