Im not sure what to think of anything anymore. Im so emotionally hurting.... I need comfort and I need rest and I cant seem to find either. They way I feel isnt really something I have felt before. Im not depressed but I am sad.... Things are changing again and I know that its a good thing -- whatever it is.... Im just so tired and worn out. Things keep changing and I just really want to have some stability but I guess God doesnt think its time for that. Im not anywhere that I expected to be at this point in my life. In many cases things are better..... but there are some things that I wish was different. I really thought that I would be married by this point in my life.... and here I am not even to keep a girlfriend when I find one. Maybe its true that I am worth a lot to God but sometimes I dont feel like I am.... and I really wish that someone thought that I was worth fighting for.... but so far when things got tough, I was left on my own.....

I especially dont know what up with tonight..... Ive just had these tears welling up behind my eyes. I feel like its going to burst at any moment and Im just going to bawl.