sometimes I think I should just give up on having a life..... I mean, I have a purpose and things are working out really well.... I like my jobs and I like what I do.... but it seems that I'm just not supposed to be able to hang out with people tho... I dont really know what.

Its kinda hard.... I woke up this morning.... I was in a great mood.... church was great.... lunch was great...... but now I'm here working because .... well, it just seems that outside of Sunday mornings, I dont have any friends.... I was told that I need to ask people to go hang out with me.... and I do try... but it never works out.... I tried today and, well, it seems that its not going to work out. I'm not attacking my friends or anything.... I do care about them, but it just seems that I dont ever get to spend time with them outside of church and lunch after church.

I want so badly to either just sit and talk with one person.... just time to talk heart to heart.... or to go to a movie and just hang out and enjoy something together.... I'm heading up to PA tonight.... I was going to go right after church but it seemed like we were going to hang out tonight.... so I stayed here longer.... oh well... I'm taking the time to do some work at my church so I guess it's not wasted.... *shrug* Hopefully skiing will be good tomorrow night. I havent skied all year.... the plan is to actually hit the slopes tomorrow. Thats at least one thing that I can do by myself and still enjoy it... I tried the "finding more friends" route and that didnt work so I guess maybe I just need to focus on finding more things that I like to do by myself.

Life goes on... God's got great things in store. I just really wish I had some time that I could relax instead of working on some project somewhere.... but if I'm alone, I resort to working on projects.... heh, I guess I'm at least productive.