I want to write something here but I just dont think words are capable. Sometimes you think something is going to amazing and, while it is extremely amazing, its not at all amazing in the way you had expected.

God does amazing things in our lives but what He does often remains a mystery for a long while -- but so many times this only makes things even more amazing.

There is something that I didnt realize until tonight.... I really just never realized how much pain my heart has been carrying. The saying goes "if you dont use it, you'll lose it" and I think this applies to all of our hearts. What I mean is the ability to feel emotions. If people dont take interest in your heart, it will become hard.... The harder it becomes, the more effort required to break it. Sure, you could say that breaking a heart means pain..... exactly! You will never be able to fully love or be loved until your heart has those rocks removed. So when the first person that comes along that is actually commited to helping, you better expect some painful times. You havent felt certain emotions in a while so you may not understand what is happening.... but you'll start learning all you knew before.